Family is a many tricky thing

I was raised in a large family. We lived 8-9 houses away from my Dads twin brother and his family as well. My cousins were more like additIonal brother and sisters to me. Close is not a strong enough adjective for how we were raised.

Nearly every weekend and definitely every holiday was spent together. I love my parents so much for the gift that was my innocent childhood. They did an amazing job of keeping us children shielded from adult conflicts and or issues. Which is to say when I became an adult I was blown away to learn that my Mother and my Aunt didn’t like each other. And just as shocked at learning about other family members issues with each other.

My Father passed away from a massive heart attack at age 56. I was 22. The family unit died that day as well. Of course the family had grown up and most had married and had kids and were living in other cities etc. So the weekend get togethers were defunct and holidays were fast wanning.

I still held my siblings and my cousins in the highest regard. There’s never been a time that I wasn’t excited to see/ be with any of them. Still to this day I drive 100’s of miles for a short visit.

Ive been incredibly blessed to have been able to start and finish school in the same home. Equally as much to have stayed in the same area and built a business here. I have the luxury of literal lifelong friends. I was blessed with my Mothers gift of gab to coin a phrase. Which is to say that I am definitely not shy. I can and do talk to anyone about any thing. So I make friends fairly easily. I literally know thousands of people and have scores of close friends. This is something that brings me great joy.

Very early on when I was dating my first wife we were at a local bar and I ran into a couple guys I’d not seen in a couple years. They hung with us for the evening and picked up the check as well! On the drive home she said to me... “Wow everywhere we go you see people you know, and they are all genuinely happy to see you!”

When Stephanie and I were on our first date at the end of the night she said... “I love your peeps! You’ve got a lot of friends and they’re all so nice!”

Honestly making and keeping friends and my relationships with my family is something I hold dear. I can’t express how important it is to me. And how much it affects me when something occurs that tarnishes or ends any relationship/ friendship. Which brings me to my largest point of this pondering.

My brother and I haven’t spoken in 11 years. A few weeks ago one of my sisters decided that she no longer wants me to be part of her life. As for why? With my brother there are no reasons whatsoever. He just arbitrarily decided that his life looks better without my presence in it. But my sister has imagined a situation where I’ve threatened to wrong her. And has decided that because it’s plausible it must be true. I refuse to entertain what if’s or he said she said so I’m now down 2 family members who acknowledge me.

How can a man who loves every single person he knows and most of those he doesn’t know. Who preaches against hate, racism, bigotry exc. Who has friends who’d bet their lives on his integrity, be so misunderstood by 2 of the 4 people who should know him best?

Id love feedback here...